This is Not Another Sad Poem

This is not another sad poem. This is a skipped Sunday morning service poem repackaged for Monday. Hallelujah. Or something like it. I’m not all the things I've had to survive to get here. I’m not all the pieces of wreckage I'm trying to fit into my mouth. Yes, my knees quiver but the only time I let them buckle is when I'm in prayer and I skipped church because I think I'm saved enough. I mean I don’t intend to do some sinning and I don’t believe we are born unworthy of goodness. And it was not my fault I was abused. Is there a God that values the same things I do? I’m looking for a congregation that starts on Monday mornings and believes in abundance. I’m looking for a place where I can write a poem that isn’t sad. I’m not searching for holiness. I’m just trying not to lie. I’m just making myself a life and I don’t want to give grief any more time.